Weeding Through

I’m sitting here, at my kitchen table, typing onto a screen, with not a whole lot to say.

Not that I haven’t been thinking a lot, of course.

I have.

I have been thinking a lot.

So many ideas – for blogs, for workshops, for life, for paintings – have sprung into my brain recently, some serious – reflections on the creative process – some silly – why are pizzas round?  My expanded amount of free time and lack of co-workers has led to me discussing some fairly interesting things in my brain – and, I admit, sometimes out loud.

Normally, when I get a fairly interesting idea, I spring on it.  I dive to my computer.  I fervently rush to my keyboard to type out the stream of consciousness that comes out of my brain.

Instead, recently, I stop.

I breathe.

I listen to my thoughts.

I become aware of myself as the thinker, and detach myself from whatever emotion has nested itself within me.

I meditate.

And suddenly, I don’t care so much about what I was just thinking.  It doesn’t seem to have the same immediacy, the same rush.

I am an idea machine. I generate them by the second.  I am passionate, full of energy, curious.  Why would I impede this, you ask?

Because, sometimes, silence is better.

Meditation is helping me to weed out my thought process.  I’ve recently uncovered things about myself that I thought were far from the truth.  Each day I surprise myself in how I react, in what I can do, and what I choose not to do.

Right now, my course of action is inaction.

My movements are slow.

My breaths are silent.

My mind – although not still – is calming.

I am starting to learn to weed through my thought process.  And, instead of inhibiting my creativity, I think it will help, when I get there.  I think, once I learn Presence, once I step away from the immediacy of a passion, once I can immerse myself in contentedness, that my best work will flow from me.

At least, that’s all I know for now.

Many non-updates to come.

Categories archive, Blog, Uncategorized

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